My grandchild gambles
This information is for grandparents of a child with a gambling problem. Do any of these situations sound familiar to you?
- You have discovered that your grandchild is gambling.
- Your grandchild is gambling and you’re not sure whether this is a problem.
- Your grandchild is gambling again.
- Your grandchild has lost a lot of money after a spell of gambling.
- You are looking for help for your grandchild.
- You want to help your grandchild, but you don’t know how.
How can I make sure my grandchild gets help?
Has your grandchild lost control of their gambling? If so, they need help. It’s difficult to stop gambling on your own. Help your grandchild to seek help. There are many types of support available: from online support to more intensive therapy (sometimes involving medication). There is also support specifically aimed at young people. For example, many addiction treatment centres have a youth department. As the grandparent of someone who gambles, you can also turn to these centres for help. You could, for instance, attend special information evenings.
Why is your support so valuable?
As a grandparent, you’re often someone they trust. Your grandchild feels safe with you. That can make it easier to talk.
Your grandchild’s brain
In the Netherlands, gambling is legal from the age of 18. Although a person is officially an adult from the age of 18, a young person’s brain functions differently from that of an adult. The brain continues to develop until the age of 25. Until then, a young person is not yet fully capable of assessing the consequences of their choices. It can therefore be difficult for them to gauge the consequences of gambling.
Tips for grandparents
You can help by:
- Listening calmly and without judgement
- To show understanding
- Asking questions such as: “How are you really getting on?”
- Not to provide immediate solutions
Sometimes it’s enough just for someone to feel that they’re being listened to.
What should you avoid doing?
You want to solve problems because you’re worried. However, some actions can actually make gambling worse:
- Offering money
- Paying off debts
- Threatening or getting angry
- Pretending that nothing is wrong
This is often done with good intentions, but it usually doesn’t help in the long run. As a result, gambling problems persist.
Make sure you look after yourself too
Worrying about your grandchild can be very stressful. You may feel sad, angry or helpless. That’s normal. Talk about it with family members or friends.
Would you like some advice or someone to talk to? If so, please contact our helpline. You don’t have to go through this alone.